I don't want to write again and again the same fears and frustrations but the truth is that things haven't changed that much. I've found out that I, as a person, can be recharged over and over with the same source of energy. During these grim days of melting sunshine and icy mornings I tend to search for more than the obvious answer: My life can not be like theirs. It would be easier just to look at the image and never question the source but I cannot find it in me to be satisfied with the mere sight of what things are supposed to be. And in this confusion that makes so much sense I sense that the real matters lurk somewhere deeper. If I could dream with the huntress I could maybe wake and stop running. Or could I really? It all depends if I can remember the dream.
This is vague even for me but it is what's in my heart. And I cannot turn my back to that, not now, not ever, and during this strange and lonely night, I cling to the notion that the morning may come with a new sun.
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Satisfaction doesn't come with what's on the horizon, it comes with where you are when you're there, in the here and now. If you can look around yourself and realize you're doing everything you can, that you're doing well while at it even through the hardships, then you're either content with who and where you are, or you're too tired to care ;-) Think about it.
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